The UM SPEC class has been a unique opportunity for me for many reasons. Reflecting back on the last two and a half years' involvement in this program, I see that a primary lesson that I will take away with me is the great value had from sharing openly about challenges and listening to the feedback of others'. For much of my life I was intensely anti-confrontational. As a result, I felt that conversations that were difficult or tense should also be avoided. SPEC class and my subsequent leadership role on the T-Team helped me to reflect upon, strategize and confront difficult situations. This lesson is important as we think about the goal of SPEC - if we want our communities and the people living in them to improve then we have to willing to acknowledge, address and, sometimes, confront difficult situations in our community.

I found it difficult to regularly keep up with the assigned reading for the course. This is purely my fault. Sometimes I thought that I had made a mistake in volunteering to participate in the program when there was so much going on at work and in my personal life. But then I would ask myself, "If not me, then who?" While I recognize that I didn't always do the reading, I feel like it was a necessary sacrifice in order to complete the program at all.

During the final semester there were a series of classes that focused on collaboration that really stand out in my memory. The series occurred shortly after the social service agencies in our community struggled to survive the threat of draconian budget cuts from the county. Perhaps it was the timing that contributed to the extremely open and honest dialogue that we had during those classes. I remember sitting in the room during those classes and realizing how connected I felt to the people and agencies in the room. It was evident, then, how far we had progressed from the initial meeting when the group, appropriately, questioned whether it was possible to have successful discussion of organizational growth and challenges in a setting that included their funder. I had prior knowledge of each of the agencies represented in the class. Now, I have greater understanding of wide array of issues that are addressed by the agencies beyond the Trust-funded programs they operate. Additionally, I know why they address these issues. I believe that it was very advantageous to recruit upper-level management staff to participate in the class because it was very beneficial to be able to engage in discussions about why our organizations make the decisions that they make. As a result of these discussions, I occasionally had a different perspective in my approach to decision-making within my own organization.

Three weeks ago, I announced to the staff at The Trust that I had resigned effective May 3, 2010. I'm excited and nervous about this new stage in my life. I am sad to leave The Trust. It has been such a wonderful place to work. I am mostly sad about leaving the wonderful friends and colleagues that I have worked with for the past six years. I am also sad about not being a part of the good work that is done as a result of The Trust. This organization is doing so much to improve Miami.

Since announcing my decision, I have spent a lot of time reflecting on the past six years and especially the past three years, during which I have experience unmatched professional growth. I am overwhelmed by gratitude during these moments of reflection. My current success is in large part due to the faith that others have had in my abilities and the opportunities that they have given to me as a result.

In many ways, this is what SPEC is about. I have benefited personally and professionally because others believed in my strengths and gave me opportunities where I was empowered to reach my full potential.

I am leaving The Trust, primarily, to focus on my family - to spend more time with my son and a new baby coming in August. I will also spend about half of my time taking from my husband the responsibility of running the child care center that we own. This will enable him to work less - as he is currently single-handedly running two businesses. We believe that these changes are necessary to strengthen our family and prevent problems in the near and distant future. We know how if we want to instill in our children certain values, beliefs and behaviors, then we need to invest in them now. It is primary prevention. If we want to achieve certain results, then we have to invest early. Doing so will help to prevent poor outcomes that we wish to avoid.

This new phase of my life will also include becoming involved in running a child care center in an extremely underprivileged community in Miami, Allapattah. My center is licensed for 160 children, we are near capacity and 95% of our children receive child care subsidies to attend our center - many attend with full subsidies because they cannot afford to contribute any money to regular care.

I fully believe that if you don't feel some fear before a major change then you aren't challenging yourself. I can honestly say that I have a healthy level of fear and excitement about this challenge. I am excited to take the knowledge that I have gained at the Trust about what people in our community 'need' and try to apply these principles and practices firsthand to a needy population. Funders are often criticized for being 'out of touch'. We have great ideas about what programs will work to help communities, but then watch as agencies struggle to implement them. I don't believe that I'm so naïve to think that it is just so easy as implementing a program.

Each day that I visit the center and see 18-month old children leaving the center in a car as they stand on the car seat - I pray that I can make some positive change there. The SPEC class may have prepared me more to deal with this population and the challenges of trying to provide opportunities to these families than working at the Trust alone. I hope that I will try to find ways to implement best practices around issues like car safety and nutrition - in a manner that is empowering to families. I hope that I can give them information so that they want to learn more.

Thank you to my classmates - I have truly enjoyed getting to know you all better personally and professionally. You have been wonderful representatives for your agencies.

Shaleen.